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Welcome back to the blog: your favorite bi-weekly word press written by your favorite 5th years refusing to go into the real world.


4th of July weekend is finally here: a time to take a break from working to celebrate the freedoms that we have as a country. It is also an opportunity for almost every American to go to their favorite source of water, park themselves with a case of cold beer and kase mate, and spend the weekend wearing a whole lot of red, white, and blue.


Ladies and gentlemen, we have a lot of ground to make up. After not being able to properly celebrate last year due to COVID, we are back and better than ever and ready to make this the best fourth of July yet.


However, before we do that, we need to make sure we are doing it the right way: here are some tips if you are a young adult (of legal drinking age) and want to maximize your experience on the water while making sure we all have.


  1. Start Early
  • This is your drinking super bowl: if you can leave work today and head down to the beach a day early, that is a world of difference for both your drinking experience and your hangover. 
  • Now from a drinking standpoint, this is a double edged sword. Actually, nevermind starting at 7AM is not only encouraged, it’s the standard around these parts. Make sure you get some bacon, eggs, and other breakfast in your system and by the time noon rolls around you will feel their patriotism of uncle sam flowing through your veins.
  1. Buy your alcohol before you get onto the island/main beach
  • Don’t get me wrong I am all in on supporting the local mom and pop shops on the island; however you’ll most likely find a piggly wiggly or some super chain with doubled the pricing on almost everything. Pro tip: snag the beers 30 minutes before you get there and use the rest of the money at the local bars and stores. We are saving small businesses, thank me later.
  1. Don’t be a d*uche
  • I’ve lived at the beach my entire life and I see it almost every year: two tourists, for whatever reason, feel the need to get too drunk and try to fight each other in front of a bunch of kids/families. If you’re a dad, don’t be this guy. If you’re anyone: don’t be this guy. The 4th is a time to relax and get along with your fellow Americans. Let’s crack beers together, not skulls.
  • Also don’t litter, you’re not bigger than King Neptune and his humble abode.
  1. Enjoy the weekend
  • If you followed all of these simple steps, you are most likely going to have a great weekend. Yes, you might get sunburnt. Yes, you might drop too much money at the bars. But the 4th is the 4th and it is time to have the lake or beach weekend we all deserve.

Remember to stay hydrated (throw in a couple waters), look out for your fellow Americans, and have a fun and safe weekend. Don’t forget the Kase Mate when you’re packing!

  • Matt (CEO of America-ness, big freedom guy)
32 comments

32 comments

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